Let’s talk of Bajan characters:
Some from long ago,
One or two of more recent times
That you may know.
These were comedians
In their own rights
Though to many Bajans back then,
They weren’t too bright.
Some were called vagrants
With no fixed abode
And this, because they always seemed
To be on the road.
But they were brilliant
In what they portrayed
Thus, most of them are remembered
Up to this day.
At the top of my list
Was one called Ossie More,
Almost all of the jokes about Ossie
Are now Bajan folklore.
The top featured post
That you’d find on this blog
Is Ossie Moore and hundreds of hits
He has so far logged.
Hailing from St. James,
He was a real fine soul
And we once shared a mutual friend
Thus, so I was told.
I didn’t know Ossie
But I knew some who knew
And there was some exaggeration
Re what he did do.
He didn’t put Pepper
In the pot that day
But somehow that circulated
And we had our say.
Pepper was the dog
Rather than the spice,
I wonder how it would’ve tasted
In some white rice.
Neither would he have lit
The boss lady’s garden
So, both you and I can appreciate
No such problem.
No, Ossie was the comedian
And he told the jokes
But clearly, they backfired on him
So, he was the sport.
I recall seeing Gearbox
Come up the school drive,
Just so, students were around him
Like bees in a hive.
This was at Combermere
During the luncheon recess
And we were all treated to a show:
“Comedy at Its Best”.
Gearbox was a mechanic
So I was told
And from my observation of him,
He was quite bold.
His car was superannuated
To say the least
But his dexterous handling of it
Was as smooth as grease.
The fact it still worked
To Gearbox was a credit
But I understand that as a mechanic,
He was good at it.
Needless to say
The show was very short
For with the appearance of the Head
He was forced to abort.
He was a friend of a PM
That shall remain nameless,
I saw him him drive his Mercedes;
Now you take the test.
Bat Is a Flying Mouse
Oh, what a name!
But I tell you, messing with him
Was a dangerous game.
As boys we teased him
Just to have some fun
But when he started out after us,
We had to run.
He threw stones at us
But without much luck,
In those days, we learnt to run fast
And expertly duck.
Bulldog was well known
To Empire cricket fans,
To him Empire was the greatest
In all of the land.
And when Spartan met
With his favourite team,
Bulldog was sure to be a spectacle
To add to the scene.
I can see him in Queens Park
Traipsing up and down,
Smiling when Empire was on the up
But otherwise, a frown.
Sharkie was another
We would regularly see
When the Wesleyan Holiness Church
Held its Quarterly.
This was at the tabernacle
On White Park Road,
In those days most would walk
While a few drove.
There we would see Sharkie
Enjoying himself
And later partaking from baskets
That sustained his health.
He was well taken care of
By these Christian folk
And no doubt in Sharkie’s mind,
This struck a note.
Next up on the list
Was one called Sam Monkey
Who frequented Government Hill
And the Ivy.
He was good for exercise
When you called his name
And while he never caught anybody
We enjoyed the game.
Sam Monkey was tame
And soon we refused to run
But as boys as you would expect,
This was no fun.
Big Dick was a huge man
And pushed a box cart,
Not only was he big and ungainly
But clearly not smart.
He was quite eager
To pelt you with stones,
Tweedside and Carrington Village
Was where he roamed.
Extremely large feet
Was one his characteristics
But he was not particularly slow
Should you shout, “Big Dick!”
Not much, I am told,
Regarding conversation,
Dick seemed to be all that he knew
Under interrogation.
When questioned in Court
Every answer was Dick
And whether he knew more or not,
It was a cool trick.
Georgie Porgie is another
And used to sing in a calypso tent,
He won the calypso crown in 1987
As the then Clown Prince.
He wrote his own lyrics
Often in the palm of his hand
Composing them the same night
On which he sang.
On stage with legends
Like Serenader and Invader,
Dragon, Adonijah and Johnny Ma Boy,
Smokey and Night Stalker.
Georgie Porgie passed
Shy of his seventy first birthday
And once there remains a Pic o’ De Crop
He’ll be remembered each year.
Dagon the False God
Might not be very familiar
But to the youth in Government hill,
He was a monster.
One of my brothers
Reminded me only today
Of a Dagon encounter in which he almost
Did not get away.
Were it not for the canes
Located above our house’
That day, Dagon the monster cat
Would have caught a mouse.
That small cane-patch
Saved my frightened brother
When Dagon zeroed in on him alone
And forgot all the others.
Long after Dagon left,
My brother hid in the patch,
Afraid to venture out of this refuge
And give Dagon a catch.
The next character
Was the most glamorous one
And is remembered for his uniqueness
Though long gone.
A bicycle he mostly walked,
I’ve seldom seen him ride,
And bright coloured three-piece suits
In which he could not hide.
The brightest of reds
As well as greens and yellows
King Dyal, by name but not status,
Was an intriguing fellow.
Somewhat fretful at times
Especially when he was teased,
Black cattle, he called his own colour
Obviously, none too pleased.
A fixture at Test Cricket
And internationally acclaimed,
Once present at Lord’s cricket ground
And announced by name.
The last one on this list
Passed away quite recently
And a tribute was done to honour him
By a famous attorney.
On YouTube is an interview
With this particular character
And his reflections about his lifestyle
Was more than chatter.
A natural comedian
Though not at all simple,
Ninja Man confronted a policeman
Over something legal.
Caught with a door
He requested a search warrant
And behind the door partially hidden,
He was quite adamant.
For his portable home
Ninja Man posed with a door
Having two locks and open louvres
With nothing more.
A daily tabloid captured it
And boy, wasn't that amusing?
With Ninja Man looking out the door
And the police objecting.
Twelve Bajan Characters
Now part of Bajan folklore,
Ossie Moore takes the cake for me
With his jokes galore.
Stewart Russell © November 11, 2026
