If I send you for the left shoe
And you bring the left shoe,
Wouldn’t that be the right shoe?
But if I send you for the left shoe
And you bring the right shoe
Then that would be the wrong shoe.
You see the wrong shoe is the right shoe
And the right shoe is the wrong shoe,
A sure case of when wrong is right.
It is like driving in Barbados:
To drive on the left is to be right
There is a possible case of being left dead
If you are on the right.
Why do people sit on a collapsible chair?
Isn’t that reason enough not to sit on it?
Funny enough they are never marked.
If the house burns down
You may have saved some stuff
But if it burns up nothing might be saved.
It is said that…
The bottom line is that if you work hard
You would likely reach the top.
However, if you don’t
Your top will be someone’s bottom.
If I ask you if the answer is “no” and you say “yes”
Then your “no” is the same as “yes”,
It means for once I can trust your word.
To dig a hole one starts from the top
But to get out of it he starts from the bottom.
If there is no top there is no bottom.
He told the truth when he said he lied
But he lied when he said he told the truth.
Don’t you worry; I have the proof.
People living near a cemetery
Are never buried therein
But then again neither are those dying elsewhere.
He was standing at the front of the church
But the evidence was inadmissible.
As to whether he was inside or outside
Either of the two was probable.
If one is coming back now
It would have to be now he is coming back.
So chances are, he will arrive later.
If nowhere is no place
Then how is it possible to get there?
And more particularly to get there by doing nothing.
There’s one thing I cannot do when I am sleeping.
That is to wake up.
Yet, that is the very thing I am expected to do.
I am especially concerned
When I am not concerned
Since not to be concerned
Gives me a very good reason to be concerned.
Is it possible to do the impossible
When the impossible is not possible?
Yes, only if the impossible is possible
Then God can.
If you get something done
Then it is clear to me you haven’t done it
Since if somebody did it for you
You could not have done it too.
The dead know nothing and we don’t.
If that is true
Then the dead knows something that we don’t.
If the dead knows something that we don’t
Then to know what the dead knows that we don’t
We must die.
Is it worth it?
Knowing nothing, I mean.
If a problem is a problem before it is solved
What is it after it is solved?
No problem.
If a soldier steps off on the wrong foot
And that is the right foot
Then quite obviously
His left foot would be his right foot.
If his left foot and his right foot
Are one and the same,
Then it logically follows
That he must be a one-foot soldier.
The child was punished for being wrong
Yet he was the right child all along.
It was discovered after he was pointed out
That he was, in fact, the right child.
What is the opposite of an “open-hole”?
I guess you would say a closed-hole.
But could that be correct?
How could it be a hole if it is closed?
I will finish at this point
And I trust you see the point
For if in fact you haven’t seen the point
Then I would not have made a point.
Stewart Russell © May 2019
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