When you argue with a woman
You lose it from the start,
For you argue with your head
She argues from the heart.
From the very start
She uses her woman’s intuition,
You will bring fact after fact
But she doesn’t even have to listen.
You will raise your voice
As she frustrates you with her line
And as you wonder how she got there
You’d be running out of time.
For time is on her side
The longer the argument goes on,
She has much staying power
She can argue way past dawn.
While you are longing for some sleep
She is warming to the task
And she doesn’t answer your questions
Don’t even bother to ask.
You cannot derail a woman
When she switches on tunnel vision,
You are fighting a losing battle
Even after the argument is done.
Fact after fact you’d bring
Laid out in an organized fashion
And fact after fact will fall to the ground
As she persists with relentless passion.
I wonder how long it took
For Adam to give into Eve,
It wasn’t the apple, by now you know
It was what her eyes revealed.
For a woman argues with her eyes
And through them shines her heart,
Therein is a basic position
From which she will never depart.
The man, he will see the logic
The woman zeros in on the need,
“There is not sufficient funds,” he says,
“I have some stashed,” she pleads.
She is often miles ahead,
She was planning while he slept
And though he presents ten reasons
Each one becomes inept.
O yes, he presents the facts
And each one appeals to commonsense
But she counters stronger every time
From her wealth of experience.
When arguing with a woman
There is little chance of winning,
That’s why they make better lawyers
It’s been so from the beginning.
No doubt when Eve went to Adam
With the lovely looking fruit
He reminded her what God had said
But that went down the shoot.
“O honey, I know what God said
But that’s not really what He meant,
I actually touched the fruit today
So that clearly was not his intent.”
She took a bite and he did too
And apparently they did not die
So the woman’s argument held water,
What God had said was a lie.
Now I know this started out as a poem
Comparing a woman and a man
And how they approach an argument
And the kind of line they plan.
But suddenly in the midst of it
Something different occurred to me,
It’s no use continuing on this line
When there is something more to see.
In our arguments it’s about winning
And to that end we blindly proceed
And soon we lose sight of what’s important
As those things of importance recede.
The past becomes the present
As the historic record is brought to bear
Evidence regarding who is better or worse
And respect for one another disappears.
Apparent forgiveness turns inside out
Regarding the wrongs of the past
And soon the argument becomes a quarrel
And an impasse looms at last.
The woman’s heart is ripped out
And the man’s logic goes through the door
And Satan’s strategy for dividing them
Now comes through to the fore.
There’s no winner in the argument,
Only losers battle scarred and undone,
Nothing gained but a lot eroded
Is the stark evidence that neither has won.
Relationship takes a hard knock
And what was built up is now broken down
As the years of solid relationship
In a moment becomes unsound.
Cracks appear in the veneer
And the foundation becomes suspect
And what was mutual acceptance
They now both totally reject.
No spoils are there for the taking
Since everything has been spoiled,
Both agitators have built up sanctuaries
Into which they now have recoiled.
The argument is never ended
It plays out in their minds
With each apportioning the other blame
A Winner we will never find.
I am not saying do not argue
I’m just saying be careful when you do,
Invariably there is no winner
And this is my recent view.
Stewart Russell © June, 2017
