Simpleton’s Response

 

 

You’d recall Christmas morning

And how Moron behaved in church,

And Simpleton’s annoyance with him

And how much she felt hurt.

 

Embarrassed is a better word,

It was in front of her church family

And as expected, on reaching home,

She exploded angrily.

 

“Moron by name and nature!”

She shouted at the top of her voice,

“You forced me to act violently in church

Thus giving me no choice.”

 

Your behavior was deplorable

And that is the least that I can say,

I thought you’d have made an exception

At least for Christmas Day.

 

And what did you expect?

That’s the suit you wear to funerals,

And besides the jacket is big enough

To comfortably hold two people.

 

Contrastingly I must add,

The shoes are one size too small

And obviously they will burn you,

That is all!

 

You kept pulling at your tie

As though you are a little child

And what is more, that atrocious frown

Made you look like you had died.

 

 

As a matter of fact, dear Moron,

I really wish you had

For you would have behaved better

And I wouldn’t feel so bad.

 

And worst of all, my pastor,

When he began his preaching,

Before he finished reading the Scripture

You were already sleeping.

 

Hence, the punch in your ribs

And that rude awakening!

It was my way of saying, dear Moron,

You should be listening.

 

And tell me what did you hear

If anything at all?

Yet, when the service finally ended

You applauded the loudest of all.” 

 

 

I guess you must be saying

Moron’s wife cannot be a simpleton

For all that she has said so far

Is of a sensible expression.

 

But you would recall, dear reader,

While Moron wanted to get home

And even as we speak, my friend,

He is in another zone.

 

While Simpleton was pontificating

Moron was actually sleeping,

And hence, he never could respond

While his wife was speaking.

 

Yes, so finally you get it,

Simpleton was talking to herself

But in this there is some consolation,

Regarding her mental health.

 

I hear it’s good to talk to yourself

But never to answer back

So, Simpleton had a talk with herself,

But it never became a chat.

 

For to have become a chat

She would have had to answer back,

In this she was particularly clever

Since a responder she had lacked.

 

Quite fitting for one another:

Our Simpleton and Moron,

A perfect match, you may disagree,

Though a confusing union.

 

Stewart Russell © December 10, 2022

Into May

As this year speeds along

And we swing into May

Let me start by wishing you

A very wonderful day.

It’s more or less the same

As the month before

But God will give us grace

To help us to endure.

Thank God for the showers

He has sent us each day

And from all appearances

There’ll be some more in May.

Grateful for the May flowers

That came out yesterday,

Remember this is spring time

So expect a lot in May.

The big day coming up

Is the 24^thof May,

On that day the voters in Barbados

Will have their greatest say.

They alone will determine

The nation’s decision makers,

On that rare occasion

They get to be movers and shakers.

Elections have been called

And the predictions have begun

As every concerned Barbadian 

Anticipates the outcome.

An ugly act has occurred

To mar the ongoing campaign,

Let’s pray to God above

There’ll be no such act again.

Vandals broke the windows

Of a DLP constituency office, 

An act both D’s and B’s resented

And have publicly dissed.

Both D’s and B’s have declared

Zero tolerance for vandalism,

They’ve called on their supporters

To refrain from such fanaticism. 

Church leadership has called

On all parties to keep it clean

And to keep mudslinging and violence 

Off the campaign scene.

Barbados has a great history

Of peaceful and fair elections,

All parties must therefore strive

To sustain this rich tradition.

I’m still losing friends

At a phenomenal rate,

At two funerals per week

You could imagine my state.

That’s not all though,

On Monday I attended two,

Now there are three pending,

That’s my funeral review.

By now New Year resolutions

Would have faded away,

Four months have passed

Since New Year’s Day.

Hopefully some good practices

Are now in place

Even if at this point

There is only a trace.

Any improvement is good,

Such will stymie the bad

And though it mightn’t be much

There’s still reason to be glad.

I must remind one and all

That now is the best time for change,

Don’t wait for a new year

To have your life positively rearrange

And so as we move into

The second quarter of this year

Have a Spirit filled one,

That is my earnest prayer.

Stewart Russell © May 2018

Into April

Well we are into April

And what have we got?

The year is at high speed

That is what!

What have you achieved?

If anything

At least one resolution

Would be reason to sing.

April showers are with us

I am thankful,

We really need the rain

Be a grateful people.

I’ve lost some friends

Both young and old,

So far I am still here 

At least so I’ve been told.

Funerals every week

I wish they would stop

But then I have been attending

So for me no cemetery plot.

We’re awaiting an election

I wonder when it’ll be called,

Some people don’t mind

Others are appalled.

There is quite a bit of apathy

That’s not so good,

But people should keep promises

They really should.

The road fatalities continue

With two on Easter Sunday,

Just an error in judgment

And two are gone death’s way.

We still have the homicides

Both stabbings and shootings,

More stabbings lately

In a matter of speaking.

  

A lull in school incidents

But then schools are on vacation,

Less activity in the van stand

And at the police station.

Common Entrance is on the way

As well as CSEC and CAPE

To be followed by graduations

In these examinations’ wake.

By then we may be in May

Implying those who remain

So I’ll stop here for now

And revisit the first verse again.

Well we are into April

And do you see what we’ve got?

Quite a number of things

We had hoped would have stopped.

Let’s major on the affirmations

And minor on the negations

And if there is some approbation

Let’s be grateful for the commendation.

Stewart Russell © April 2018