Standpipe Politics with Smartie and Moron (4)

 

 

Hi Moron, wuh become o’ you?

I en see you in donkey years

And since de last time dat we talk

Another thirty-love appear.

 

Well Smartie, I went down Guyana

With a few black belly sheep

Cause I hear they doing better down dey

Cause they getting more meat.

 

Wait, wait, Moron,

What is that you say?

Wuh, if black belly sheep eating meat,

Then cows should bray.

 

Not that kind of meat, Smartie,

I meaning grass.

Down dey de grass real plentiful

And de sheep does grow fast.

 

Cause yuh know Guyana real big

And got a lot of land

So I thought I would get away from here

And work a different plan.

 

So why yuh come back here, Moron,

If down dey so good?

Yuh should o’ stan’ down in Guyana;

I really feel yuh should. 

 

  

Well Moron, since we last talk,

There was another 30-love

Cause you know back in 2018 it was like

It did come from above.

 

Judgment pon dem devils

For all the evil dey do

But I en sure dat we is all de better

Tell me, do you?

 

Smartie, I uses to tell you

That we does only change faces

And if you really examine politics,

In all o’ dum is evil traces.

 

Dum is start out real good

And mek you feel real smart

And den all of a sudden, bruggadown!

Duh does brek yuh heart.

 

When I hear bout de 30-love

I tought bout de tennis on the lawn

And den I hear somebody suh,

All de D’s gone!

 

And all I could say was,

Yuh mean dah happen again?

Not even the respectable Bishop

Could avoid de pain?

 

Cause don’t forget the PM seh

He was de party’s conscience

So wid de Bishop gone from the party,

Dah’s conscience absence.

 

  

Yes Moron, uh doan hear he,

He probably went back to de church

Cause in dey he could lick he wounds

And heal he hurts.

 

But why yuh come back

If you was doing so well?

I would o’ expect yuh to stay in Guyana

For a longer spell.

 

Well Smartie, since yuh ask,

I was forced to come back

Since uh hear black belly exportation

Run off de track.

 

How yuh mean run off de track?

Duh does go by train?

I hearing ‘bout all kinds of excuses

But that one real lame.

 

You is say by name and nature,

And that I could never change

But I will tell you something, Smartie,

You real strange. 

 

Run off de tracks is a saying

Meaning tings en going as plan

It en nuttin to do with train transportation

Fuh black belly rams.

 

Yuh see, de breeding slow down

And dey can’t export

Cause dey would deplete the numbers

And dat ain’t sport.

 

They have to build back up

And get de breeding gine again

Plus, I also read in de Barbados Today

Animal husbandry wane.

 

De young people en intrested

And it too risky

Cause all yuh want is a little bad weather

And the project is history.

 

I see whey yuh coming from

But Moron, you gine give up too

Cause food importation seem to be

The more popular view?

 

Not as long as God gih me breath

And trust me, dah is true,

I aim, God being my helper, to do

All uh can do.

 

  

Moron, I want we to end

Just like we begin

Cause you know better than most

Politics is my ting.

 

Thirty-love when you did hey,

Thirty-love when you did away,

You tink another thirty-love coming up?

Wuh you say?

 

Smartie, dis is what I tink:

Thorne will end up like Atherley

Cause Thornie cahn even win up there

In dah St. John constituency. 

 

So, just like Atherley lost

Thornie will lose too

Cause both of them change constituency

And dis is a wrong ting to do.

 

Best chance, I tell you,

Is stay wid who put in you,

Don’t change constituency or cross de floor;

Dah’s my humble view?

 

Moron, old fella, well said,

De PM got this sown up tight

And unless a few more from de BLP defect,

Any single MP will lose de fight.

 

 

 

Atherley then Thornie

And after Thornie, who next?

I must confess that I don’t have a clue

But de situation got me vex.

 

 

 

Cause we need a replacement

But I can’t see any,

The so-called DLP terribly fragmented

And is a multi-party.

 

Dah’s more support for de BLP

Thus, another thirty-nil

And uh really fed up with the BLP

Cause I had muh fill.

 

Dum is bare talk dese days

And passing nuff foolish laws

And de most vulnerable suffering so much

Duh grabbing at every straw.

 

  

So, Moron, dah is all fuh now,

You can have the last say,

Uh glad this standpipe still standing here

So we could meet today.

 

Same here, Smartie,

All de best wid de black belly sheep

And I trust somebody come up wid a plan

To feed all o’ we.

 

Stewart Russell © November 16, 2025