How to Catch Corona

It is out there somewhere

And getting nearer for sure,

If you want to catch it

Here is what you should know.

Know what you are dealing with

Be absolutely sure,

It is the Coronavirus

But let me tell you more.

Also known as COVID-19

It is worse than any before,

When it invades your territory

You are afraid to go out the door.

However, they are some I know

That are pretty adventurous

And they seem to want to know

How to catch the Coronavirus.

For most of you,

Continue as before…

Cough and sneeze indiscriminately

In and out of doors.

If you have it

You will surely spread it

And all those around you

Will catch it like a habit.

Restrain from washing hands

Hug and shake more often

And catching the Coronavirus

Will never be a problem.

Like playing with your face?

Touching your mouth and eyes and nose?

So too does Coronavirus,

That’s exactly where it goes.

Corona likes to ride on planes

And there is nothing like a cruise,

If you want to catch Corona

Just keep on playing the fool.

Drop all your safety guards,

Behave like you just don’t care

And you’ll be sure to catch Corona

Once it is passing near.

Corona is a virus family

This one is called Covid,

Quite a few of those who caught it

Eventually ended up dead.

I do not understand the 19

That is stuck on to its name

But it appears that catching Corona

Will cause its captor much pain.

Many were successful in Wuhan

In catching this deadly virus,

So, if you really want to catch it

Wuhan should be your purpose.

Do respect my wishes, though,

And the wishes of others like me,

If you happen to catch Corona

I don’t want to see.

If you want to catch it

In a crowd would be the place to go

And if somewhere in there it’s hiding,

It will soon become exposed.

All the things you should not do

Just go ahead and do

And you’ll be sure to catch Corona

Before this month is through.

Just a little reverse psychology

To keep you out of trouble,

For if you should catch Corona,

It will surely burst your bubble.

Please practise good hygiene

And wash your hands thoroughly,

Especially after touching handrails

Or doorknobs and even money.

Practice respiratory protocols

Like coughing into a tissue

Or excusing yourself from the group

If a sneeze is coming at you.

And please stay away from Corona

It is not a profitable catch,

Throw out your line somewhere else

Or you might be an obit stat.

We regret to have to announce

Someone who made a catch,

That did the things he shouldn’t have done

And was caught in the Corona trap.

 

If you try to catch Corona

Corona is sure to catch you

And maybe a few of your important others

And that could be quite a few.

Think not of yourself alone

But of your loved ones and affiliates too,

Don’t be a victim or a carrier

Do what you know you should do.

Who would want to catch Corona?

Nobody in his right mind,

So, be an avoider, not a catcher

And Corona will be gone in no time.

Stewart Russell © March 2020