To Whom the Spoils?

When you argue with a woman

You lose it from the start,

For you argue with your head

She argues from the heart.

From the very start

She uses her woman’s intuition,

You will bring fact after fact

But she doesn’t even have to listen.

You will raise your voice

As she frustrates you with her line

And as you wonder how she got there

You’d be running out of time.

For time is on her side

The longer the argument goes on,

She has much staying power

She can argue way past dawn.

While you are longing for some sleep

She is warming to the task

And she doesn’t answer your questions

Don’t even bother to ask.

You cannot derail a woman

When she switches on tunnel vision,

You are fighting a losing battle

Even after the argument is done.

Fact after fact you’d bring

Laid out in an organized fashion

And fact after fact will fall to the ground

As she persists with relentless passion.


 

I wonder how long it took

For Adam to give into Eve,

It wasn’t the apple, by now you know

It was what her eyes revealed.

For a woman argues with her eyes

And through them shines her heart,

Therein is a basic position

From which she will never depart.

  

The man, he will see the logic

The woman zeros in on the need,

“There is not sufficient funds,” he says,

“I have some stashed,” she pleads.

She is often miles ahead,

She was planning while he slept

And though he presents ten reasons

Each one becomes inept.

O yes, he presents the facts

And each one appeals to commonsense

But she counters stronger every time

From her wealth of experience.

When arguing with a woman

There is little chance of winning,

That’s why they make better lawyers

It’s been so from the beginning.

No doubt when Eve went to Adam

With the lovely looking fruit

He reminded her what God had said

But that went down the shoot.

“O honey, I know what God said

But that’s not really what He meant,

I actually touched the fruit today

So that clearly was not his intent.”

She took a bite and he did too

And apparently they did not die

So the woman’s argument held water,

What God had said was a lie.

Now I know this started out as a poem

Comparing a woman and a man

And how they approach an argument

And the kind of line they plan.

But suddenly in the midst of it

Something different occurred to me,

It’s no use continuing on this line

When there is something more to see.

In our arguments it’s about winning

And to that end we blindly proceed

And soon we lose sight of what’s important

As those things of importance recede.

The past becomes the present

As the historic record is brought to bear

Evidence regarding who is better or worse

And respect for one another disappears.

Apparent forgiveness turns inside out

Regarding the wrongs of the past

And soon the argument becomes a quarrel

And an impasse looms at last.

The woman’s heart is ripped out

And the man’s logic goes through the door

And Satan’s strategy for dividing them

Now comes through to the fore.

There’s no winner in the argument,

Only losers battle scarred and undone,

Nothing gained but a lot eroded

Is the stark evidence that neither has won.

Relationship takes a hard knock

And what was built up is now broken down

As the years of solid relationship

In a moment becomes unsound.

Cracks appear in the veneer

And the foundation becomes suspect

And what was mutual acceptance

They now both totally reject.

No spoils are there for the taking

Since everything has been spoiled,

Both agitators have built up sanctuaries

Into which they now have recoiled.

The argument is never ended

It plays out in their minds

With each apportioning the other blame

A Winner we will never find.

I am not saying do not argue

I’m just saying be careful when you do,

Invariably there is no winner

And this is my recent view.

Stewart Russell © June, 2017