Too Dumb to be Impressed

 

 

 

Dumb, dumber and dumbest

I am too dumb to be impressed,

I feel a lot better now

I have got that off my chest.

 

But what do I really mean?

Is it that I am stupid?

Or is it directly related

To something that somebody did?

 

Not what somebody did

But more what somebody said

And I must admit here of late,

Much of what I have read.

 

Somebody says something

That goes right over my head

And I am too dumb to be impressed

At what that body said.

 

It sounds particularly insightful

But I just don’t get it,

Too dumb to be impressed

Is becoming a regular habit.

 

Like, “I was a former teacher.”

What does the person mean?

Has he returned to the profession?

Is this what I should glean?

 

What’s wrong with I was a teacher?

Does this lack impressiveness?

With the former I must confess

I was too dumb to be impressed.

 

Take these times we live in!

How far can $1500.00 go?

A long way responded one Minister

But how much does he know?

 

 

In any case, more than I do

And to that I can attest

For after listening to more like him

I am too dumb to be impressed.

 

I listen to the applause

That attends some politician’s remarks

And I am so dumb, I tell you,

I am often left in the dark.

 

A politician must be a magician

Given the tricks he so often does

With alluring words that flow like honey

Though only an incessant buzz.

 

I suffer diminishing returns

And I grow less bright each day

Wherefore too dumb to be impressed

Is what I often say.

 

Like a certain moderator

Who gets annoyed at a certain caller

That regularly calls about an issue

That is a serious bother.

 

“You call ‘bout that again?

Man, it’s time you let that rest.

You know how many listeners think

That that is foolishness?”

 

 

 

Small fish are raked over the coals

But big fish are forgiven their debts,

Back into the ocean they go

With little or no regrets.

 

Little impresses me these days

And I know it’s because I am dumb,

I have been missing the punch line

And these comics are no fun.

 

I speak of these politicians

And their political propagandists,

It is sometimes difficult to determine

Who is the ventriloquist.

 

No new taxes raised

But food prices are still climbing

But that’s no big thing for certain people

For it does not affect their dining.

 

This was the apparent reason

Why the unions decided to agree,

The tax stick was hanging overhead

For all of them to see.

 

All of this is dumbing me down

Making me more stupid than before,

Yes, too dumb to be impressed

And I can’t take much more.

 

 

 

Gasoline has gone up yet again,

I really wish it would stay down

And that 40c a litre we pay at the pump

Helps to make things brown.

 

I just picked up this one

And seriously, I cannot let it past

But I sincerely promise you

It will definitely be the last.

 

“If we don’t address this…

We will find ourselves in a serious position.”

From one member to the others

In a certain political opposition.

 

So, when politicians impress you

With all of their rhetoric

I am too dumb to be impressed

By any of their tricks.

 

Stewart Russell © April 2, 2023