The One-Eye Photographer

 

 

I know you won’t believe this,

This tale I have to tell

Of a photographer extraordinaire

Who plied his trade quite well.

 

He was a one-eye photographer

Back in the old camera days

And he, to confront his disability,

Employed some interesting ways.

 

Well as you would surely expect

Only one eye could see

So, he charged half price for a photo

Since only half a photo could be.

 

You see, he didn’t have a problem

Squinting through one eye

Like those photographers long ago

Of so many years gone by.

 

Out of both eyes they could see

But chose to use only one,

This photographer had no such problem

For one of his was gone.

 

Well, he had a great clientele,

To him the people would flocked,

Half price for a whole photo!

Which sane person would not?

 

However, because of his one eye

Only half a photo came out,

And of this he convinced most

Though a few had their doubt.

 

Having developed each photo

He would cut that photo in half,

Half price was for half a photo

Half more for the other half.

 

Some people had half the money

And could only buy one half,

I tell you, now I think about it,

I cannot help but laugh.

 

If it were a group photo

You could buy the half with you,

I suppose that was a win-win exchange

For the photographer and you too.

 

But the one-eye photographer

Began to wise up to their way

And charged double for group photos

Such that he still received full pay.

 

 

I always use to wonder

Why photographers closed one eye

But would never dare to ask any

Since I was always quite shy.

 

One eye takes half a picture,

That one-eye photographer proved it

So that when they tried to “juck out his eye”

He found a workable trick.

 

I know you won’t believe this,

This tale I have just told

Of a photographer extraordinaire

Who, I must say, was quite bold.

 

Stewart Russell © August 29, 2022