Dead and Aware of It

 

 

I have tried to imagine

What it feels like to be dead

And the closest I have come to it

Is being asleep in bed.

 

I have experienced at times

Though not in the recent past,

The consciousness of being dead

Which left me quite aghast.

 

I had not retired as yet

And was really pushing work

Such that at times when I was resting,

I would suddenly come alert.

 

It is not easy to relate

The strange phenomenon then

But my medical doctor explained

It was definitely a problem.

 

Having awaken from sleep

I would lie transfixed,

I could not even move a finger:

Even to scratch an itch.

 

It would seem a long time

But it was just mere seconds,

And though I needed urgent help,

I couldn’t even beckon.

 

Alert and very aware

But couldn’t utter a sound,

It was like being buried alive

Under a molded mound.

 

My eyes, although open

Could not even be blinked,

I was dead and very aware of it

Whatever you may think.

 

It is a horrible feeling

To actually feel you are dead

Only to know you are still alive

And very much so instead.

 

I had really needed rest:

A total shut down, in fact,

So that while I slept every night

It was deep sleep I lacked.

 

Those seconds of paralysis

Were a warning to me,

My system in responding to the lack

Prompted me to see.

 

 

 

 

Emergency shut down!

It was not all systems go,

Something was about to go wrong

And I needed to know.

 

I was repeatedly warned

And had I repeatedly ignored

This could have ended with me

Not being around anymore.

 

 

A word to workaholics:

Heed the body’s warning!

Don’t be dead and be aware of it

And yet go on ignoring.

 

Else, you may drop dead

And definitely not be aware,

Of being interred in yonder cemetery

Amidst many a tear.

 

Stewart Russell © March 26, 2025

 

Come Apart or Fall Apart

 

 

This world is a rat-race

Driven by fierce competition,

Its constituents are obsessed

With personal ambition.

 

Sinner and saint alike

Working twenty-four-seven,

Both trying to make of this world

Their respective heaven.

 

Both putting in the effort

To accumulate great wealth

While both are seemingly unaware

Of their decreasing health.

 

Refusing to come apart

And therefore, falling apart,

Overworking their mortal brain

And stressing out their heart.

 

 

The result, as is expected,

Are numerous strokes

And heart attacks more frequently

In even young folks.

 

Rest is very essential

As well as periodic reflection

And neither is remotely possible

Without intervention.

 

Warning lights are blinking

Alarms are going off

But no letting up coming soon

Until our river is crossed.

 

Evident are the wrecks

Of those that fell apart

Disregarding all the warning signs

That urged to come apart.

 

Even Jesus in his ministry

Took time to come apart

And did the same with his disciples

So they won’t fall apart.

 

 

But we are workaholics

And often we’re proud to be

And while our health goes into decline,

It is never suddenly.

 

Come apart I urge you

Or you will eventually fall apart,

Reflection is a brain activity

Supported by the heart.

 

Mark 6:31

 

And he said unto them,

Come ye yourselves apart

Into a desert place,

And rest a while.

 

Stewart Russell © June 15, 2024